If a cow ever got the chance...

OK, so here is a list of the people who will be staying in my grandma's two-bedroom house* in Florida for the next week and a half:

*Not a big two-bedroom house either; it's in one of those gated old-people communities

My dad
My mom
My grandma
My other grandma
Me
My sister
My sister's boyfriend
My brother
My brother's college roommate
My brother's college roommate's uncle (described by the roommate as "He's kind of a deviant. Is that OK?")

Carlos wisely chickened out on being part of this menagerie, or I could have added him to the list too. It's probably a good thing, since my parents are kind of mad at him. He compares unfavorably to the Pinoid's boyfriend ("the Android"); not only is C not a fount of Minnesota jokes and good cheer (at my parents' house he mostly hides in the bedroom playing Final Fantasy on his laptop), he's not even my boyfriend. The parents are not pleased about any of this (even the "not my boyfriend" thing, which you would think they would be, given all the other things they're not pleased about).

In the interests of full disclosure, I should point out that if all goes well, not all these people will be there at the same time; BCR and BCR Uncle are only staying for a couple nights, and Pinoid/Android aren't arriving until the 28th. Me, I'm in it for the long haul--starting tomorrow and continuing through the 3rd, or 4th, or whenever they drop me off in Chicago after our little road trip back from Orlando. No access to computer, so no updates and no e-mail.

Must get back to today's regularly scheduled activities: wrapping presents badly** and watching this fucking boil on my face get ever bigger.***

**Yesterday I was forced to mail a ball of crumpled tissue paper held together with two pieces of scotch tape... I have the best intentions but am always missing at least one crucial ingredient: scissors, tape, wrapping paper, opposable thumbs. It's not like I'm totally un-crafty (I can crochet and make really intricate paper snowflakes), but somehow my gift-wrapping skills remain at toddler level. For years the Pinoid has been wrapping all my presents except her own, which I have to do myself for obvious reasons and which then provides lots of amusement for everyone as it sits lumpily under the tree, looking "special."

***The "nostril bump," a.k.a. this giant boil in the middle of my face, is apparently a routine phenomenon among new and healing nose piercings and I have been assured that it will eventually go away. Meanwhile, coworkers are staggering backwards at the sight of me.

I hope everyone has a wonderful and peaceful holiday. See you in 2004.

<<|>>

You might have missed...

wah - 2005-03-14 - 9:24 a.m.

Let's review - 2005-03-07 - 7:29 p.m.

- - 2005-03-02 - 1:07 a.m.

yay? - 2005-02-16 - 5:53 p.m.

all apologies - 2005-02-15 - 5:56 p.m.